It’s been fifteen days since I moved in. Around this time in my last relationship I was sleeping on the couch and planning my escape. I literally can’t wait to go home to him every day.
OBVIOUSLY I’m aware I’m in the honeymoon stage of a relationship.
Disagreements arise, opinions are argued, feelings get hurt. Tensions will always emerge – whether it is over some petty issue that we create in our own heads, or… real issues that need to be talked through and resolved. Majority of arguments come from expectations that we create that our partner doesn’t meet.
The best part of these expectations? We don’t tell them what they are… but are pretty infuriated when they don’t read our minds.
I’m pretty open with my feelings because honestly.. I’m thirty.. and I don’t have time for bullshit. The only thing that we get in arguments about is his ex. I understand that if that baby is his, she will always be a part of his life.
I accepted the situation, and the baby… I just don’t agree with how he’s handling things. He’s SO concerned about all of his belongings because she has a key to the apartment and needs to come and get her stuff. I guess angry exes can have that unpredictable kind of crazy that makes him so afraid. His biggest fear is her coming in, getting a rush of adrenaline, and ripping his TV off the wall with her bare hands (which is wall mounted about 8 feet from the ground).
In my opinion, it isn’t fair for her to not know the full story. His reasoning for breaking it off is missing something… and in her head, there is room to squeeze herself right back in his life. Meanwhile, he’s going grocery shopping with me, planning trips to IKEA, and sending me text messages at work saying things like:
I’ve been a lot happier in my overall life since the day we met. A lot less miserable and angry. Knowing you’ll be the last person that I see/talk to before I fall asleep, and the first person that I see/talk to when I wake up in the morning makes me feel really good. I’m really glad we met. If you’d let me, I’d like to make you this happy every day, for the rest of your life.
Well despite his efforts of keeping me a secret from her world, she found out. This is just a chronological list of events that took place last night:
- A friend of my boyfriends came by after work to grab food with us for dinner
- She made a Facebook status about it, and tagged me and my boyfriend
- His ex saw the post, and proceeded to Facebook stalk me
- After lurking on my page (and my page isn’t private) – she sees that he posted on my wall saying something like “you’re hot” with some flirting back and forth
- My boyfriend gets a text message with a screenshot from my wall showing him that she saw what he wrote on my wall and says something like “Are you fucking kidding me?”
- She makes a public post on Facebook asking the world how she should handle the fact that the person she is madly in love with got her pregnant, broke up with her, and is sending messages to all these girls while he abandons her… leaving her to be a single mom
- There are about 30 comments from people basically calling him a piece of shit human being
- She comments on her own status asking if anyone had a truck so they can help her grab all of her shit from his apartment
- My boyfriend and the ex fight back and forth through texting until he tells her he’s going to bed and he’ll see her on Saturday when she has arranged to pick up all her stuff
- His friend who made the Facebook status is going into a full-blown panic attack for all the drama that she caused.
- I tell her thank you because I was pretty sick of being kept a secret
Well that’s that. I did want her to know about me and now that she does… I guess I got what I wanted.
I know he’s pretty upset with the way that it went down, but I think he is relieved the cat is finally out of the bag (or at least I know I am).